Lucille Lanza Hagstrum
May 26, 1928-Oct. 10, 2017
Atherton, California
Mom, the granddaughter of Italian immigrants from Campania, Italy, was born Lucille Rose Rosalie and raised in Greenwich Village, New York.
Her mom, Lizzie, and her dad, Tony, were wonderful, warm, loving parents to mom and her four younger siblings Andy, Frankie, Rosie, and Anne. There was always laughter, the smell of food cooking, and lots of people coming and going in the place where she grew up.
Mom would keep things that way in every other place where she resided. She went to school in New York City and worked at Bayer Aspirin as an executive secretary in the late 1940s. In 1953 she married a returning soldier from World War II who was a fellow Italian American. Vince was six years her senior and had also grown up in the Village -- just a few doors down from mom.
After giving birth to 3 kids in Summit, New Jersey, Vince and Lucille ventured west to Atherton in 1959 to be part of a new startup company, Raychem. The Raychem clan became family and mom and dad were supremely happy in their new California home. Mom even convinced her brother, Frankie, and her sister, Anne, and family to move out west to the Bay Area.
We vacationed every year on the beach in Southern California and delighted in doing so. It was dad’s habit, having grown up in New York, when confronted with a balmy January day in his new California home, to turn to mom and say, “Well, Lu, looks like another sh***y day in paradise.”
Mom never failed to laugh at that and Dad was always rewarded with a big hug and a smooch. She made lots of friends and took up new interests. Notably, she traveled every week to San Francisco with her best friend, Dorothy Gravelle, to learn metalsmithing. We all have beautiful boxes and other keepsakes, which Mom fashioned during those years. (Thanks, Mom!)
Tragedy struck in 1972 when Dad was killed in a plane crash while traveling on Raychem business. The Raychem family rallied around Mom and we all got through it.
Mom was lucky in love and married Paul Hagstrum, a gentle Swede from Minnesota, in 1977. She moved back to Minnesota with Paul and was ecstatic to have a new flock who loved her as much as she loved them.
But lightning does occasionally strike twice. She lost the second love of her life to cancer in 1981. Perhaps love is like bocce ball and it’s best to quit while one is ahead. So Mom devoted the rest of her life to her interests and to her kids and her grandkids.
Mom spent decades as a volunteer at the Stanford Museum. She was a board member of the Committee for Art, a founder of the Contemporary Collectors Circle, and she served tirelessly on the Treasure Market Committee. She loved traveling with her fellow volunteers to see museums and private art collections around the world.
Mom was a natural at raising money. She and her longtime friend and neighbor, Esther Heslop, conceived of and threw the first Rodin by Moonlight event in the 1980s. Mom was proud that what she started has grown to become the signature fundraising event on the Midpeninsula.
Mom is survived by her sister Rosie (Rocky), her sisters-in-law Susie and Darlene, her three children with Vince: Doug (Anne), Drew (Jane) and Ellie (Richard), and her step children with Paul: Marilyn (Les) and Paul (Leda). At last count (and we had to count) she had 14 grandchildren and five great-grandchildren.
Mom took enormous pride that none of us divorced and that all five of us built happy families. We never tired of hearing her say that she had great kids. She laughed and lived well and healthy until the day she died, buoyed by her burgeoning family and the humor and good will that it provided.
Our job was to keep Mom laughing right to the end and we’re happy to report that we never failed in our duty. Mom’s death, as she wished it to be, was a swift and easy exit for one of the last great dames of Atherton. We love you, Mom.
